Life on Coltrane Mill: December 26, 2009

It is the day after Christmas Day, still holiday time. We have the New Year's arrival yet to celebrate. 2009 is full of so many memories, good ones, those that stir up my emotions, and make me so sad. I haven't blogged since July due to numerous reasons, but mostly, I didn't feel like I could do it. With the death of Dad in February, the death of Mom in June, I've become such a changed person, and it hasn't been for the best either. We also lost Mr. and Mrs. Clark this year, our wonderful neighbors when we lived in Ramseur. I had to put down a pet for the first time ever. Micala had gotten too ornery and hard to handle. There have been so many happy episodes in 2009, especially with the birth of our fourth grandchild, Cyrus. But since June 14th, I have for the most part, lived in a state of melancholy. God has always richly blessed me and I'm so grateful. I know also that he has continued to hold me, staying right by my side. I cling to Him knowing that He is the answer to my sad state of mind. Dad and I had a special relationship and I miss him so much, miss caring for him. But he had several diseases working against his 90 year old existence. He had been blind for 20 years. I know that he has a new body and can see once again now. Praises to you Lord! Oh how I miss giggling with my precious Mom. I miss our conversations, her presence in my earthly life. What a loving woman she was and cared about everyone. She was loved and respected by so many too. Maybe I'm turning a corner today in recognizing that life goes on, that Mom and Dad would not want me to continue in this melancholy state of mind. So today, I will begin blogging once again. I am so behind and will not try to catch up with everything that has happened since June. But I will hit the highlights and things may not be in the order that they happened! I'll begin with Christmas in my next post. But this one is dedicated to Mom and Dad. Love you both so much and I'm thankful for the life that you provided for me. Things weren't always happy, but you did the best that you could to help me to grow into the woman that I am. I hope that you are still proud of who I am and what I've accomplished. Miss you both, but it gives my heart joy to know that you are smiling in heaven with Jesus.